Friday, July 1, 2011

The day the Opossum came to visit

Time for a good laugh.

Go back to about 1988 and in Blytheville, Arkansas....

Mark and I were married about 3 years at this time and he was stationed at the Air Force base there and at this time we were living in a was a very nice actually had the prefab curtains (very very nice ones!) and it came mostly furnished.  We had our own stuff so whatever we didn't need the landlord removed.  The trailer was a 3 bedroom and it was just us two but the price was perfect for us.  The master bedroom was at the front of the trailer with the living room and front door next to that and then the kitchen and the rest of the place.  At this particular time, Mark was working swing shift and usually went to the gym afterwards and would be home about 1:00 am.  I was in college at the time and had exams the next day so I went to bed.  I don't know what time it was but I woke to hearing this scratching noise and thought it was Mark coming in scratching the wall to find the light switch.  When I called out "Hey you're home early" and got no response except for more scratching I got out of bed and went to the bedroom door and turned the light on in the living room....saw this HUGE Fuzzy Thing...did I mention HUGE! I screamed and it just looked at me from the middle of the living room.  I jumped on the couch which was two feet from where I was standing.  I screamed more.  The Fuzzy thing looked at me more intensely.  I screamed and saw the phone...way way way WAY across the room. I jumped on the coffee table...and screamed again.  The Fuzzy Thing now looked at me and I swear it was smiling and it was saying "See my sharp teeth" I knew I did not want to touch the floor at all costs.  I was much skinnier in those days and more apt to be able to leap tall buildings in a single bound. was a leap over the other side of the room to the chair.  I did just that.  The Fuzzy Thing ran to my bedroom.  OMG I was dying.  I called the gym and asked to speak to Airman Kerhin, I told them he was probably in the racketball courts.  He comes on the phone and below is the conversation we had (yes I remember this VERBATIM):

Mark:  Hello


Mark: Calm down, it's just a mouse

(we have had field mice in the house, I know what one looks like and I have caught several)


Mark: ok ok I am on my way.


So I jump my way back to the couch and to the front door.  I grabbed Mark's jacket and tennis shoes (size 10) and sat outside in the chilly winter Arkansas was about 35 lol.

About 20 min later, Mark comes home and asks why I am outside in the cold.  I said, "cause there is a HUGE FREAKIN FUZZY THING IN MY HOUSE"

He slowly opens the door and the words from his mouth were "oh shit, what the hell"

Uh huh, tell me it is a field mouse now.

He comes out about 5 min later with this Huge Fuzzy Thing in a laundry basket and by this time I am now sitting in the car with the doors locked LOL.

He takes the Thing over and lets him loose behind the fenced in field.  I get out of the car and asked him what it was ...he tells me it was an opossum.  I said Holy crap!  Upon our investigation, we found were it came in.  The landlord was working on our bathtub piped earlier and had taken the skirt off of the trailer.  If you know how trailers are set up, you know that in one of the bedroom closets near the bathroom was a panel and behind it was the pipes...the pipe that comes in from outside was not covered and you could see outside...and it was big enough for the Huge Fuzzy Thing to get in and visit me.  Also, if you know anything about trailers, they have huge storm windows that you place over the windows in the colder weather.  Well, we took one and barricaded us in so to speak.

The next day, Mark was due to go TDY for the Air Force, he would be gone for a couple of weeks.  I was not going to spend another night in this place until the landlord fixed the hole and put the skirt back on.  So that day and night, I stayed at our friends' house.  The landlord fixed everything and I was back in...but you can bet I barricaded myself in at night until Mark came home LOL.

Tell me about a critter you have had in your house!


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